We have big news, we were chosen as adoptive parents! Now just hold on there. Don’t go getting too worked up. I’ve been holding off writing for just that reason. I knew you’d get excited, then I would get excited. But let’s try to remember: nothing is definite.
The birth mother is due November 2nd, which is both a little too soon and a little too far for me to be comfortable. After we got the call, we had one evening of elation before we crashed, a mountain of emotions. There is a lot to feel and we are doing our best to hit all points on the emotional arc of adoption. We are cautiously optimistic, which isn’t as much fun as elated, but after the last few years it’s the best we can manage. In the state where we live, a birth mother has up to 48 hours after giving birth to change her mind about giving her child up for adoption. And although we feel pretty good about things, nothing is certain until then.
It is super strange telling people. I keep debating whether it would be better to just show up with a baby rather than have to explain to people about the uncertainty of adoption. Like I just did with you. But you’re worth it, right?
Then, there is the rebound of grief and guilt that happens after I’ve had a day of feeling happy or positive about having another child. The next day I feel like a mack truck slammed into me. I’m all weepy missing Jordan and walking aimlessly around the house.
I may not be pregnant, but we are getting to experience the roller coaster of waiting for a baby. So that’s nice. I will write soon about meeting the birth mom. Keep us in your prayers too 🙂